The Mad Carpenter and his wife:
Lawrence and Danny Rue Thomas
These two characters just can’t get enough of people, so they have embarked on this great adventure. The carpenter would rather entertain interesting guests than go back into the real world to drive nails and mill wood. But there is no B&B without his lady – Miss Quality Control. Her expert eye for detail is exceeded only by the taste of the treats from her oven (especially her acclaimed granola) and the legendary warmth of her personality. More than anyone, she knows how to take care of people.
It happened once upon a time
A carpenter of normal mind,
Happened on a house forlorn,
And in his brain a thought was born.
“I’ll make it nice with not much work.”
He failed to see that trouble lurked.
The basement needed space and more;
The carpenter looked at the floor
And sixteen inches down they went
Until his weary crew was spent.
Not satisfied with shape and size,
He got that glazed look in his eyes.
The house expanded to the east,
By five and twenty feet at least.
The attic was demolished too,
Replaced by story number two.
You’d think a normal man would stop,
But he stood back and eyed the top.
“Up there,” he said, “is room for more;
Let’s build another attic floor.”
And sure enough two bedrooms sprang,
And neighbors said, “Well, I’ll be danged.”
The family, friends, and passersby
Could only watch and deeply sigh.
“He’s a crazy man,” they all opined;
“He’ll never quit! He’s lost his mind!
His wife, poor thing, must suffer so -
He’s mad, plumb mad. That much we know!”
So when you go about the place,
Observing all the ample space,
You may sense madness in the air
And see a strange man living there
Who has a twitch next to his eye.
You’ll want to laugh, but please do try
To smile instead, ’cause it’s for sure–
It’s him, the mad, mad carpenter.